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Life is just a chail or bowlies - a world of possibility
Life is just a chail or bowlies
That is what is written on front of my quotes book. Would you call it a book? It's wirebound with paper - blank paper (well the pages I haven't yet written on).


There were times, and once in a blue moon are still times that sneak in, where I wanted something else - not necesserily more, or different.

I would watch movies, or read books and I wanted to be those people - not the typical though. When I was younger they were characters similar to "Pretty Woman" or "The Princess Bride" - someone who was rescued and taken care of. Later it was characters who were sought after - like in A Midsummer Nights Dream The most recent were, well I'm not sure the connection other that they were strong minded women - Amelie: unique and love just fell into her lap. Tomb Raider: The female version of Indiana Jones. Shopgirl: Someone went through their own growth and came back and appreciated the woman so much more.

These are all my interpretations, and the characters would vary -drastically sometimes, but it wasn't necessarily that I wanted to be them, but more that I wanted some characteristic, or aspect of them or their lives within me.

I opened my mailbox today. Sitting along with a bank statement and another piece of junk male was this green envelope (yes yours - only receieved one green one so far). The smile I aleady had from my day grew across my entire face as I raced upstairs to drop my PETCO bags full of kitty litter.

I saved the green envelope till last so as to taunt and tease myself which eventually leads to relishing in the enjoyment of it :)

As I was putting it away where I put all of my lovely cards (I have some from when I graduated in 1998, lol) I looked at a few cards hat were already in there. Little things like this, they just, I feel like I'm going to explode with how happy it makes me feel. Something so simple, yet in the same respect because of what is put into it - no matter how small and plain - it's soul warming.

These are the things I do like about growing up. The ability to send and receive things, not because we are "supposed to", but because we enjoy and appreciate the impact people and the world have on us, and we on them.

I like being me. Elysa Lee Barron. Today giddy and smiling. Tomorrow who knows. I do what I love and am a paradox, contradiction, and often make mistakes, but I don't think I'd give it up for anyone else's life. Oh, and I must add distracted (I've gone to do other stuff 3 times now, and couldn't remember if I posted).

I've been in contact with someone who in my head was not only male, but with a deep voice. I call on the phone and it is a friendly, but very apparently female voice - I suspected that when I picked up the phone to call. I thought "lemme guess, a female will answer and claim to the name".


So, as for the "date" last night, due to unexpected delays of sorts we forwarded to tonight. So many different, sompare and contrast thoughts. I don't know what I want out of it, if anything. So . . . I'm just going to enjoy myself and see the new Lord of the Rings movie (if he still wants to, twas my suggestion since I want to see it).

Hopefully neither of us will fall asleep since it will be late and we both seem to have had long days and short nights recently.


enough, I start to babble. I dislike myself babbling

I hope everyone is well.

Much goodness to you.

1 comment or Leave a comment
sassenach From: sassenach Date: December 23rd, 2002 01:07 pm (UTC) (Link)

don't worry--you CAN'T fall asleep, it is so good!

and i know what you mean about wanting some aspect of some person/character...
1 comment or Leave a comment