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So . . .

I have arrived to my NY home safe and sound.

I am about to dive headfirst back into my career objectives, a tiny step more intensely then before ~ thanks to a conversation with my dad.

Next trip home I am designating a night for everyone to come to my house ~ big get together. It will be so much easier then running around everywhere trying to see as many of my friends as possible (which didn't accomplish much). That will leave me more time to relax and also to see my folks and just be in the outdoors.

Had a nice afternoon with nolf. We went to the Canal, which was wonderful in itself. I almost forgot to enjoy the outside that I don't have at NY home.

Family get togethers. Does anyone ave any suggestions of how to get family members to open up at one of these? There are all these wonderful people whom you care about, and yet you rarely do more than scratch the surface when you get together.
They are wonderful resources. They have very different views of the world, and yet the discussion never gets past work or relationships - meaning who or how long, not the fundamentals of relationships.

I need a big hug, preferably from my WKU soul. I probably won't see him till tuesday though, blegh. I am patient, so it is all good.

So here,

Sex as just a physical pleasure. I like to blieve I'm more than just a tool to make someone feel good.

I also have better more productive things I feel I can do with my time, or rather things I enjoy and value more than sex just as sex.

Why have sex without the emotional enjoyment?

Example: Food. If you eat it when you're not hungry it's most likely because you enjoy the taste. It's probably more enjoyable if you only eat when you are hungry.


Plus, are there negative effects (as there are with food)? When you eat only for taste, even if you're not hungry, it's not as special or enjoyable. You most likely will also have side affects like gaining weight, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc.

So yeah, I think I've made my point, we shall see by your questions and responses.

is for magpiegeese and manoloray.

Note: A continuing conversation discussing how different people think. :)

I am craving cereal but have no milk. Anyone wanna bring me milk?

OK I must get back into my work mode. Many auditions this week. I must also find a voice teacher, time for a voice teacher, and get in the mind frame for classes.


Classes start soon. This invigorates me greatly.

I hope everyone is well.

2 comments or Leave a comment
From: manoloray Date: September 9th, 2002 06:16 am (UTC) (Link)


Hmmm.. I never thought of sex as being like eating food, maybe it’s because I'm rarely hungry for food :p. I do think that it’s a great analogy. Thanks for putting it all in perspective, even though I was sorry I even brought it up.
And thanks for pointing just the two of us out, now everyone thinks that all we are, are sex hungry dogs :).
lordrexfear From: lordrexfear Date: September 9th, 2002 09:07 am (UTC) (Link)

Since I've been a part of this convo...

Have to throw my two cents in here, since I'm the male who is on the mid-level viewpoint between Elysa and Will.
I won't deny I think sex is awesome, but I also hold a very strong emotional bond to it. But not because I think of sex as a gift, but more so that I have had enough past experiences and sex really just isn't as fun without a bit of a more emotional attachment involved. I understand Elysa's one on one feelings, and those work for her, but I also really see Will's viewpoint that you can be utterly in love and still safely without hurting that loving relationship be able to have sex with someone else, but I come from the school that I would never have that desire. If I am not getting what I need from my particular other because of different sex drives I shall deal. What did I do before the significant other came into my life? If I (universal I) was a slut/slept around before that, fine, but if I (universal I) was the kind of guy who felt that slipping my penis into vaginas wasn't worth the energy if there wasn't some kind of preceding message of love/caring before it it was absolutely pointless.

We live in a different society than the past, a major part of the argument from what I remember, the world is already overpopulated, and humans HAVE evolved, so base instinct is now in a point where it should be ignored to go along with what is actually happening with the societal views and system that has been established. Now, I freely admit that I (personal I) aren't even following those societal rules myself these days (and those who know me, know exactly of what I speak), but in a fashion I am still following my personal viewpoint of sex/emotions and how they should be faced.

This weekend I had more than one occasion, more than two, let's say a few occasions to go against my personal viewpoints and just... well... take care of a need/desire, and I didn't take them, and it is because of established ideas and concepts of what a relationship should and shouldn't be even when the relationship isn't clearly defined.

sorry I rambled on here, but with as little as we all get to hang out together and since I didn't egt to be coherenmt in my feelings when this convo started in person, I had to throw this out here.

Okay, I hope it's clear enough and hopefully soon we shall be able to either continue this conversation or take it in other directions. Toodles...
2 comments or Leave a comment