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Letter - a world of possibility
This is a letter I'm sending to my grandmother, but I would like opinions first of a better way to get my points across maybe.

Constructive criticsim please, as in if you see something wrong, give a suggestion of how to fix it also. Both technical andfunctional (?) aspects. My grammar and structure are not always the best.

Thank you :)

Dear Grandma,

I realize that we've come to the point where we can barely speak with each other. I don't enjoy spending time with you anymore. This is not to say that oyu are a bad person or that I hate you or anything like that.

I dislike the fact that we can't spend time together and enjoy it.

I feel you are a very intelligent, caring, woman. Unfortunately sometimes you don't know how to show it or people don't understandthe meaning behind it.

For example: I want to be an actor. This is my life and I feel like I would be wasting it if I didn't do what I enjoy.

I realize that you are only concerned for my well-being when you insist that I should get a degree. Maybe I will, maybe I will not. It should be my decision though, for it is my life.

I realize your concern and thank you for it, but continuing to push your opinions of what you think I should do with my life only pushes me further away.

Another example of what makes me uncomfortable aroudn you is watching how you sometimes treat my mother, as well as others around you.

I watched many times over the weekend that we went to Maine as you would just put my mother down. Or just brush off her comments or ideas as wrong, stupid, or something of the sort.

I'm not saying she was always good or right either, because she too palyed the game.

I mean you no disrespect in any of this and realize I am not perfect either. I hope you will take this objectively, with the intent of having a better relationship.

I do realize you care and will support me, I mean you help fund my education!, but I also hope you can learn to accept, TRULY accept me as I am without "if"s, "and"s or "but"s.

Sincerely your grandaughter

That's all currently. Any suggestions, you need more background, whatever, I need opinions, etc.

Thank you

I hope you are all well.

2 comments or Leave a comment
lizzie_borden From: lizzie_borden Date: June 14th, 2002 05:06 am (UTC) (Link)
You gave me some good advice a little while ago, so as a complete stranger, I'll give you some of mine.

I don't know exactly how she is.. But I've got the mental image of my Grandmother.. Protective, opinionated, and very abrasive when the mood hit her. If I were writing that letter to my grandmother, I would sugar coat it just a touch more... just a touch.. Because if my grandmother read that all she would see is the negative, and she'd probably call and really let me have it- then again my grandmother was an absolute terror. M

y advice is slap on a few more "I enjoy spending time with you"s and "I do value your opinion"s and "I know you want the best for me"s.. and throw in one or two more "I've got to follow my heart"s.. You want her to feel loved and valued enough that she'll be too mushy to argue the fact that you're standing up for yourself.

Good luck

corto From: corto Date: June 14th, 2002 07:31 am (UTC) (Link)


Lizzy has the right of it I think...

I have an attitude... a policy you might say... and it applies to work and play. But let me tell you about from a work point of view first.

The guys that work for me get told in no uncertain terms that while I am their boss they will never write a negative email to a client, coworker, boss or subordinate... anyone. If you have something negative to say, bring it on... make an appointment and say it to their face. The issue is one of "it all comes back" and if you write something negative down it will live forever and your feelings, the reasons for your negative opinion or whatever, will not (will not "live forever") and once you click send, once you let go of the post box door, it's gone! You can't take it back and it will live forever.

This applies to my personal life as well. But don't get me wrong... I've written scathing hard core rant letters "to the editor" or to manufacturers etc... but not to "people" in my life. It just has a habit of somehow getting twisted and coming back on you with negative results.

Advice? Well there is always the concept of - just for example - playing with the mind of the reader;

Dear Granny, I wanted to write to you and tell you about how wonderful my experiences have been with the acting gig has been... It really feels like it will be a fulfilling life experience for me and there is no two ways about it, this is what I want to do. Oh, and btw, I was so sad to see how mom's been feeling. She really needs to be edified by the people in her life. I know that I am committed to boosting her self confidence and I hope the other people in her life will do the same.

You know, that kind of thing.

Good luck sugar stars... You're name will be on billboards... I just now it!
2 comments or Leave a comment