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Just some stuff :) - a world of possibility
Just some stuff :)
Just watched State and Main. An interesting and amusing movie.

I loved the music. It twas just so. It went perfectly with movie.

I suggest seeing it.

Today I battled with myself again about what I should, could, and am doing. I also ended up in an argument with my dad that just did not need to happen. It was more me being defensive and just tense for no reason.

I think I have too much of an ego at times and must realize I can't do everything myself. I could spend my life being a martyr and working for money to save for the family I will one day have, but then I would regret not living my dream.

In order to live my dream I must allow my parents to help me. They like to and want to, especially since they see I am actaully working towards something. I shall learn to be capable of accepting help!

OK my mind has gone to sleep.

I hope everyone is well.

2 comments or Leave a comment
musus From: musus Date: June 12th, 2002 04:23 am (UTC) (Link)
Very good points all around. It can be very difficult to balance between the help we accept from others, and the feeling & knowledge that we can do something ourselves. I don't know your parents terribly well, but they do seem to be pretty sane as far as parents go. Which, in a way, you should be greatful of. As you know, there are many people our age with parents (who are your parents age) that have no idea what, where, or how to "parent." Which often ends up in all sorts of painful situations for many included parties--particularly the children.

Anyway.. Realize this.. Your parents (in particular) definitely care a great deal about you. What little I know about your past, I have gathered bits & pieces that indicate two very supportive individuals helping you have the experiences you need, and would like to pursue, to become a healthy, productive, and happy individual. And seeing the output (being you), they're doing, and have done, a pretty good job.

Of course, there are always areas in which things could be better, or situations in which could have been handled more tactfully, etc. But that's part of learning, and being.

Also, something I've thought a great deal about in my own life is what parents owe to their children. This is one area in which my philosophy of "be only obligated to oneself" falls short. (Follow me here for a minute..I do have a relavent point) I believe one has an extremely crucial responsibility to not only one's own children, but to society's children. In application, your parents, by mere virtue of giving you life, have an obligation to provide you with what I discussed earlier (the experiences you need, and would like to pursue, to become a healthy, productive, and happy individual), as well as much more. However, it is a difficult...a very difficult...thing to do (and, hell..I'm not even a parent). But I think it's important to be thankful of the areas of good parenting we have been provided. And I also think it's important to be outwardly appreciative of those efforts. After all, there is only so long that we can give back what has been given to us.

It may be tough to do, but after you read this, go find your dad. And just give him a hug & say "thanks." If he acts surprised, and asks why, tell him just for being him. Trust me--it's worth it.

I hope you have a good day.
From: (Anonymous) Date: June 15th, 2002 01:38 pm (UTC) (Link)

Sound Advice from Musus

Hi Bo,

I can't fault the advice MUSUS just gave you - very sound indeed. I hope you've already done it. This might make some sense to you ........ I got on well with my folks, and although you do always get arguments from time to time (usually simply because one is striving to display one's ever-developing maturity and independence), we generally got on great.

Once I'd relocated a good distance from home, they'd come visit me, or I'd return home for a long holiday, and it would be great seeing each other again etc., and yet ....... a recurring thing kept happening. I started to notice that a couple of days before the end of each visit, we'd end up having an argument.

Now you might say it's because you get tired of each other's faults / habits etc., but I think it's even deeper. If you have a good relationship, I think you start to get stressed a little, and upset that they'll soon be going away, and it causes friction.

If that makes any sense to you, it's probably just because you're Dad and Mum are aware that they're 'little Elysa' is leaving home on a more permanent basis, and they're going to miss her. I suspect you've already sorted it girl, coz you seem to cope with things direct, but if not, go do what the Musus man suggests !


2 comments or Leave a comment