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Grown Up - a world of possibility
Grown Up
Last night two friends were married, one of whom I've known since kindergarden.

Another friend said she felt as if she should feel grown up rather than actually feeling grown up.

At one point during the ceremony the bride and groom were told to face each other and listen to a poem.

As they stood there I noticed they both kept looking into each others eyes and then looking somewhere else, and back into each others eyes. Nervous, excited, unsure of their future, caring, but ready to just be united by law.

It's odd, for whomever I marry, I shall be able to stare into their eyes, almost drown in them. Or rather, be mesmorized. Even better, find contentment and acceptance and comfort in them.

I would want to be present, enjoy the the connection, feel it strengthen, or maybe just stay the same. But I want to experience every moment of it, not just rush through the ceremony in order to be as one. I want to feel all.

If I felt the need to cry, I would still keep looking. If I felt the need to smile, I would continue looking. They are someone with whom I will not be embarressed, don't feel the need to hide anything or force myself to be any way.

For I will find myself within them and therefore can stare into their eyes for hours. Just sit and look into their eyes. No uncomfortable or awkwardness, none of that. I would not feel comfortable marrying someone into whose eyes I could not see, and who could not feel comfortable in mine.

I had a wonderful time.

Unlike the other weddings I've been to, I did not want to be with anyone, did not feel the want to get married to or need of someone. Or better put, I was content and not feeling a longing or emptyness. I felt whole. I felt strong.

It was a wonderful feeling.

I hope everyone is well

6 comments or Leave a comment
avatarstormcrow From: avatarstormcrow Date: June 9th, 2002 04:40 pm (UTC) (Link)

The nature of love?

I'm glad you had such a good time. Your thoughts on the union are stirring...and, in my opinion, very wise.
moowazz From: moowazz Date: June 9th, 2002 08:54 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: The nature of love?

From: nolf Date: June 9th, 2002 05:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
that brought tears to my eyes
moowazz From: moowazz Date: June 9th, 2002 08:54 pm (UTC) (Link)



thanks for noticing
saizai From: saizai Date: June 10th, 2002 02:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
Empathic connections are a wonderful thing.
moowazz From: moowazz Date: June 10th, 2002 02:42 pm (UTC) (Link)

6 comments or Leave a comment